Confessions of a Glock 19: It's Lonely at the Top

Like most Austrians, I try to keep it low key. You know, abide by the whole “keep your mouth closed and let your work do the talking” thing. But it hasn’t been easy. You see, from the moment I hit the scene in 1988 my detractors have done their best to discredit me. They’ve called me every dirty name in the book: tactical Tupperware, the brick, and my personal favorite, the McPistol. But after 36 years on the market I’m known simply as the GOAT.

That’s right, it’s me, the Glock 19—the pistol people love to hate.

Glock 19 Confessions

Now I will be the first to admit that I’m not the best looking pistol at the range. Just look at me. But when my designers sat down at the drawing table it wasn’t to design a pistol that would win a beauty contest, but one that would go boom every time a shooter pulled the trigger.

And man did they deliver.

While other manufactures worry about aesthetics, feel, and the latest aftermarket gimmick, all I care about is getting the job done. I’m the people’s champion. An everyman that is as functional on the battlefield as I am for your EDC.

Now in those early days it would have been easy to be let the haters bring me down. Rob me of my destiny. But I knew better than to listen to a bunch of greybeards who thought the zenith of the firearms industry came with the invention of the 1911. A lesser pistol might have given up, but not me. No. I knew that if I was to become THE bestselling pistol in the world I was going to have to focus on winning. And while the losers were playing catchup (looking at you SIG), I was busy shaping the future.

Want to know the secret of my success? Easy, it’s all about the performance, hitting the target no matter how bad the conditions. Reliability is my watchword, which is why when the going gets tough, the tough chose a Glock 19.

Proven in Modern Combat

From the dusty streets of Fallujah to the snow-laden peaks of the Tora Bora Mountains, I’ve seen it all. I’ve been buried in mud, caked with sand, fed with the worst ammunition you can possibly buy, yet when it comes time to send rounds down range, shooters know they can count on me.

Don’t believe me?

Then who did Delta Force turn to when the exposed hammers of their custom 1911s wouldn’t fire, or the FBI after that fateful shootout in Miami? Or the Secret Service, Border Patrol, NYPD—even NASA—choose when they needed a new pistol?

Classic Glock 19 advertisement from the 1980s.

Me, that’s who, and you want to know why? Because I’ve got your covered.

From the weekend warrior who hasn’t cleaned me since he took me out of the box to the mall cop with the donut-frosted Serpa 2 holster, I’ve survived it all. I’ve been dropped, abused and scratched up by DIY gunsmiths using a $10 Harbor Freight toolset. Regardless of the user’s quirks or skills, whether they are high-speed or low-drag, I’ve got your back.

Did I mention that Hollywood loves me? Yes, that right. Since that first time James Woods brandished me in “The Hard Way,” I’ve been the people’s champion. Certifiable box office gold. Don’t believe me, go check out my IMDB page and you’ll see that I’ve been in more action scenes than Jackie Chan.

I Make Striker-Fired Look Easy

The best part is, I make it look easy. No high-paid agent, no personal trainer, or special lighting, just 30 ounces of Glock perfection. Hell, I’m so good that I can make the guy in this picture look like a star.

Having more than made my point, I see no reason to continue beating a dead horse. But let this be a lesson to all you dreamers out there. In life there will never be a shortage of naysayers – haters who want nothing more than to derail your dream. For those willing to be a victim, all I can do is shake my head and pray for the best. But for the fighters out there, allow me to suggest that it might be time for you to grab a Glock. Just saying.